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Nicole's story

Nicole Taub before and after weight loss surgeryMy story starts in an all too familiar way…I have struggled with my weight as far back as I can remember, but as I look back now I don’t think I ever truly appreciated just how out of control things were at times. I was always looking for a “quick fix.” As a teenager there was the fad diet in the weeks leading up to prom; then came weight loss meetings in college (where I convinced myself that I could fit the fast food hamburger into my daily allotment); and finally attempts at clean eating and extreme food restrictions as an adult. All for what??? The immediate results inevitably gave way to weight gain well above the total I lost, and the vicious cycle would begin again.

Everything changed for me in the Summer of 2018. Getting on the scale was never a pleasant experience, and I never let my weight define me, but that summer the number had gone up - a lot - and I couldn’t account for the weight gain. I’m not even sure I saw it when I looked in the mirror, but the scale doesn’t lie. In that moment I knew it was time to stop the cycle and I made the decision to visit the Tufts MC Weight and Wellness Center. I’d had friends who went through the surgical process, some with great success, but it wasn’t until I was ready to make the choice for myself that I was able to fully commit. This was that moment. It wasn’t about vanity or the size of my jeans - I needed to get healthy and I needed help doing it.

I remember my first visit. What really stands out is hearing that I would have to wait six months before we could schedule the surgery. I couldn’t believe it. I finally made the decision to change my life and now I had to wait even longer! In the moment I was angry, but as I write this nearly 14 months to the day from that visit, I can confidently say that the six-month pre-op period was the first step to my success on this journey.

I had my surgery on January 14, 2019. The time that followed wasn’t easy. I’d spent years (unsuccessfully) telling myself, “don’t eat if you’re not hungry,” and here I was trying to meet my daily goals without much of an appetite or the energy to get up and sit at the table. Luckily I have an incredible support system in my family, friends and the team at Tufts, all of whom keep me motivated. For that, I am eternally grateful. These folks, coupled with my tendency to follow the rules, have been immensely helpful to me on my journey, and the results are better than I ever could have imagined.

I am now 8+ months post-op and have lost over 100 pounds. I have discovered a passion for yoga and am even working out regularly (I have muscles!). When I look back at old photos I struggle to recognize myself, but it’s not just the extra weight I was carrying. This journey has been about more than becoming physically lighter…an emotional weight has been lifted that can’t be reflected in “lbs.” The best compliments I get aren't about how skinny I look (although it never hurts!) but rather the people who see how much lighter and happier I am on the inside. It took me a while to get here, but I am without a doubt the best version of myself the world has ever seen. My only regret…waiting so long to get here!